Where've ya been?
Many of you have been emailing me, and even calling me, regarding the blogs lack of activity over the past month. And to those, I say, how the hell did you get my number? Some of you have said some pretty harsh things, and I recognize that my hiatus in teaching you how to run your life may be damaging to your fragile psyches. But I have not been spending the last month just wasting my time and basking in the advantages given to me by my extreme fame.
No friends, I have been following my dream.
You're probably wondering what my dream is. Well I normally don't tell people about my dream, because I fear many of you will make it your dream, not because it's truly your passion, but because you want to be just like me. But it's time you all know.
For the last six years I have been intensly training to become a DDR super master. Maybe some of you don't know what DDR is. And to those of you who don't, I pity you. I seriously have nothing but absolute pity for you.
Anywho, DDR is of course Dance Dance Revolution. Now I would think DDR would need no introduction, but in short, it's the most awesome thing ever created. So think of the most awesome thing you can think of and know that it's more awesome than that.
Unfortunately, I recently tore my ACL in an international tournament in Budapest. It was devastating, I coasted to the finals, I thought it was finally my time to take the reigns as the welter weight DDR world champion, but nay friends, fate was against me.
And so from now on, I and The Realm of Torioness are officially at war with fate. God how I hate you fate. I'm also pretty pissed with Folgers, because that whole thing about it being the best part of waking up is pure bullshit.
But I digress.
Some people have been wondering will I get back on the DDR horse after a long road back from recovery. No. I tore my ACL, and that hurts, and it hurts bad. I think im going to instead take up ski ball, it's a much more safe sport. People might tell you to play it safe and not go for the 100 pointers in the corners, but those people are jerks, don't listen to them. Shoot for 100 and talk trash regardless of whether or not you make it. And I mean a lot of trash, and talk it often.
Folgers is Yuban's bitch,
Torio
No friends, I have been following my dream.
You're probably wondering what my dream is. Well I normally don't tell people about my dream, because I fear many of you will make it your dream, not because it's truly your passion, but because you want to be just like me. But it's time you all know.
For the last six years I have been intensly training to become a DDR super master. Maybe some of you don't know what DDR is. And to those of you who don't, I pity you. I seriously have nothing but absolute pity for you.
Anywho, DDR is of course Dance Dance Revolution. Now I would think DDR would need no introduction, but in short, it's the most awesome thing ever created. So think of the most awesome thing you can think of and know that it's more awesome than that.
Unfortunately, I recently tore my ACL in an international tournament in Budapest. It was devastating, I coasted to the finals, I thought it was finally my time to take the reigns as the welter weight DDR world champion, but nay friends, fate was against me.
And so from now on, I and The Realm of Torioness are officially at war with fate. God how I hate you fate. I'm also pretty pissed with Folgers, because that whole thing about it being the best part of waking up is pure bullshit.
But I digress.
Some people have been wondering will I get back on the DDR horse after a long road back from recovery. No. I tore my ACL, and that hurts, and it hurts bad. I think im going to instead take up ski ball, it's a much more safe sport. People might tell you to play it safe and not go for the 100 pointers in the corners, but those people are jerks, don't listen to them. Shoot for 100 and talk trash regardless of whether or not you make it. And I mean a lot of trash, and talk it often.
Folgers is Yuban's bitch,
Torio
posted by Torio | 12:32 AM
3 Comments:
Juan Valdez wants to talk to you
Hold on to the DDR dream...
MCL? what are your thoughts on the muslim rioting over a cartoon?
foldgers would be dank right now. bitch who drinks Yuban?
sounds like the name of a horse.
fuck horse coffee
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