Terrorist Attacks in Jordan

Don't think I can make fun of terrorist attacks? maybe cause they are too touchy a subject in this post 911 America? Boy are you wrong. Yesterday, terrorists bombed hotels in Amman, the capital of Jordan. The attacks have been claimed by the Iraq based Al Qaeda network. So far there are fifty-six people confirmed dead, one of which was an American. Now using my special math formula, I have calculated how many deaths that America will actually care about:

(number of non-American deaths) X zero + (number of American deaths)

now lets plug in the 55 non-American deaths and the 1 American death:
55 multiplied by 0 + 1 = 1 death that we care about

Okay, so now you may be saying "Come on now Torio, that's insensitive. Of course I'm upset about each death in Jordan." But you're more likely saying "What makes you think I give a shit about the one American, I didn't know him."

Well maybe you care about all 56 "equally", and maybe there's really only one person you truly care about... Torio. But one American died, so lets see where that falls on the Reaction to American Deaths Overseas Chart:

1-20: Bomb them
20-100: Bomb them
101-1,000: Bomb them
1,001-10,000: Bomb them
10,001-100,000: Really lay it on thick
100,000+: Panic

So there you have it, we are going to go to war with Iraq to bring justice to Al Qaeda. It's about time they got theirs.

Whew,
Torio